10

Sound advice!

jennifer

Well, what about the old saying that the early bird gets the worm, or in the case, the pussy? Haha.

10

Hey Jen, how about you be the early bird and you can come get my fat, juicy night crawler? LOL

jennifer

TOP TEN EXCUSES GUYS CAN'T LAST LONGER THAN AN HOUR WITH JENNIFER:

10 - "I have to get to work very early tomorrow."

9 - "I don't want to hurt your back."

8 - "I don't want to take advantage of you."

7 - "You wouldn't want me to break your bed, would you?"

6 - "I wouldn't want you to miss Jay Leno or David Letterman."

5 - "I don't want you to think I am showing off."

4 - "I read somewhere that too much sex isn't good for a woman."

3 - "If we had sex for more than an hour, you might be too sore to go to work for a few days."

2 - "Too much sex doggie-style is bad for your knees."

And the number one excuse guys can't last longer than an hour with Jennifer:

"Well, I could last much longer, but it would mess up my PE routine."

10

Ooooh, we have our resident funny lady! Very good Jen! Kudos! I especially like #1.

happy stud

10 - Fuck the job, I'll get another one.
9 - I'll buy you some Icy Hot.
8 - Youll get over it.
7 - I'll buy you a new dam bed.
6 - I'll record the dam shows for you.
5 - Youll get over it again.
4 - National enquirer aint worth a shit.
3 - I'll pay for your dam lost wages.
2 - I'll buy you some dam knee pads.
1 - If I get my dick in you then its big enough.

southern tz

Why do men think asking large breasted women if their boobs are real is a good way to open a conversation?

happy stud

Because asking that question to small tittied women wouldnt make any damn sense.

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Pegasus

Do you get this a lot tz?
Of course I would never say this -I say dah blubber dho blubber.
On a more serious note how are you dressed when you are asked this?

Betterman

I've always tried to speak from the heart. It's very rare you will ever hear the same line twice. Although you have to be a person of detail and quick intellect. I won't give an example due to...I can't see or observe another woman I'm interested in. I guess it's hard to explain.

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If you always do what you've already done. You'll always go where you've already gone.

southern tz

Actually I do, mostly in restaurants, of all places!

bozoballz

Quite frankly I suck at picking up women. In fact I've blown it when the girl was basically rubbing her pussy all over me.... and on occasion it has clicked. Now I don't think I'd open a conversation with lines about the validity of her boobs, as much as I'd like to talk about them. My opening lines are usually like, "So.... ummm... yeah... hmm.... Do you boggle?" At which point they look past me towards the 6'2" guy behind me. Wait... that's usually how it starts. Ah shit forget it.

Actually the conversation starts with something about the weather and quickly degenerates from there. Ya know its a wonder that I've ever gotten laid, a wonder.

__________________
So it goes like it goes, like the river flows. And time, it rolls right on.
And maybe what's good gets a little bit better, and maybe what's bad gets gone.

10

I'm up there with you bozo. I HATE pick up lines, therefore, I don't use them. I just start simple conversation. Period.

In fact, I have a date tonight with a nutjob from Seattle of all places. She has apparently had really bad luck with online dating (shit, who hasn't??). So, because this chick is very literal with everything I say, I'll have to convince her that I'm not a former convict This should be fun..........

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bozoballz

haha, well I see you have your hopes up already 10. Hey any date with someone who has a pair of boobs has potential. Good luck, let us know how it goes here... I want to hear about your pick up lines.

__________________
So it goes like it goes, like the river flows. And time, it rolls right on.
And maybe what's good gets a little bit better, and maybe what's bad gets gone.

10

Well, she's already proven on more than one occasion that she's a blast to fuck with mentally. According to her, "well, you typed it so it must be true"..................boy, the places I could go with this hahahahaha! "Hey Konnie, want a 9" pink twinkie??"

This should be interesting but I've got my sister scheduled to call me if this chick gets too f'n weird on me. After all, she is my "future ex girlfriend" and, according to her "I'm another match.com date straight out of prison".

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lifted

Good question. I don't use pick up lines so at that i don't ever get dates. Im not ugly at all. Infact im rather good looking so i have been told. However my opinion on looks is that looks are over rated.

Im not shy and can pick up a conversation with women easy. But how do you ask for a date w/o seeming despoerate for a good fuck even though that is what you want. I don't know I guess I am unskilled. I get flirted with a lot. but can't seem to iniate anything from there.

I think come on lines are idiotic. But out of curiosity what come on lines would a woman want to hear? What few words would be the trigger point?

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Big in the britches!

bozoballz

Yeah most of us are like, "You Jane, me Tarzan, AHHHOOOOooOOOooOOO!!!!" "Me like you boobies, me like you round ass, me want to fuck'em you Jane. You fuck'em me Tarzan?"

Example conversation between me and Nikki:

Me: "Hi Nikki, WOW! YOU HAVE SEXY TITS! HOLY SHIT!"

Nikki: ...

Me: "Hey, where are you going?"

__________________
So it goes like it goes, like the river flows. And time, it rolls right on.
And maybe what's good gets a little bit better, and maybe what's bad gets gone.

Pegasus

Well I guess it's meant to be a compliment in a way. You know they are of such all round quality, people can't help but think they arn't real. But it is also very rude, are these guys drunk?

lifted

There you go again you ladies are making me horny! Im going to have to catch a plane to Florida! Now which one of you is from Florida?

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Big in the britches!

lifted

Why those lazy arses, ecuses! i can last an hor or better. Im multi orgasmic and have a un discipline refactory period.

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Big in the britches!

Betterman

You should have said, in a Sylvester Stallone type voice. "Hey Babes, you're really wet!"

__________________
If you always do what you've already done. You'll always go where you've already gone.

southern tz

Not lately, but in the past I have met hot guys and let them French kiss me while squeezsing my ass. Okay, what's your next line going to be?

lifted

Im going slowly stick all 8 inches into any hole you want. Is that to this side of nasty?

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Big in the britches!

Pegasus

Blubber mm firm dhou dah nice blubber woman blubber dir and so on.

Betterman

I'm picture this on a floor with dancing. In my mind he has caressed your cheek and followed the line of your jaw.

"Come with me. Allow me to take you somewhere exciting."

Now you have to ponder.

__________________
If you always do what you've already done. You'll always go where you've already gone.

Georgia Peach

I have been asked that question before. However, the voice sounded muffled and seemed to be coming from below the belt. My comeback for that one was, "I believe the chef was looking for that cucumber. Someone just put in an order for the Mini Gherkin." My friend spit out her tea. Poor guy. I bet he doesn't ask that one again.

Seriously though, I thought I was the only one that had been asked that question in a restaraunt. Good to know I'm not alone.

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I'm not the girl your mom warned you about;
her imagination was never this good.

Madame Ace 71

Damn that was a good sandwich.

Here's a new pick up line for you fellas if you see a hot chick at sandwich shop. "Can I interest you in a footlong?" Ha..ha...

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Hairtrigger

What happens if she say's yes and all you have is a beenie weenie?

Georgia Peach

((zip...flop)) Proof enough? Then again, that might get you kicked out..

__________________
I'm not the girl your mom warned you about;
her imagination was never this good.

baybabe

Thats RIGHT! So much for that pick up line haw guys? HOW ABOUT... "Wanna Snap into this Slim Jim baby?"

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"A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up" ~Mae West

lifted

Mine is not slim, but it is a bit thicker than, most i do believe.

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Big in the britches!

southern tz

Either hope she's blind, carry a magnifying glass or have your beenie weenie wrapped in a $100 bill!

Betterman

But you have to say it in a "Rocky" voice. Or Sylvester Stallone. Not knocking him, he was just "Stereotyped."

__________________
If you always do what you've already done. You'll always go where you've already gone.

Betterman

And this is someone you wanted to know? Possibly...if he had good tonguework. That is something I pride the site on. I found it trying to make Men from the Boys. Per say, not just from a physical standard. From a Character Standard.

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If you always do what you've already done. You'll always go where you've already gone.

southern tz

Just trying to help the guys who aren't as endowed as you!