Pick-Up Lines

jennifer · 10-02-2005, 04:11 PM

Okay, guys, I want you to pretend that you are either not married or not dating anyone. Now, if you ran into me at the mall, at a restaurant, in an office building, etc. what pick-up lines would you use on me to get me to go out with you?

Jennifer

Überschwanz · 10-02-2005, 04:52 PM

I'm not the kind of guy who just walks up to random girls and asks them out and I hate cheesy pickup lines. I prefer to talk to them a little first and if things are going well, then I ask them if they're seeing anyone. Keep it simple.

jennifer · 10-02-2005, 05:09 PM

Okay, Uber, you make a good point. Tell me what type of conversation would you make if you saw me. What comments and/or questions waould you say to me?

Überschwanz · 10-02-2005, 05:46 PM

Well the most natural thing is to give you a compliment about your eyes or smile. I would also try to find something to talk about that we have in common such as cooking or football. For the love of God you better like football!

dirk diggler · 10-02-2005, 06:07 PM

I wouldn't use no pick up lines with you jennifer. I would simply flop my dong out and say, "now what do you wanna do?" and hopefully i wont get smacked or go to jail for it haha.

10 · 10-02-2005, 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Überschwanz

I'm not the kind of guy who just walks up to random girls and asks them out and I hate cheesy pickup lines. I prefer to talk to them a little first and if things are going well, then I ask them if they're seeing anyone. Keep it simple.

I'm with Uber on this. I don't just randomly walk up to women and ask them out. Actually, I prefer to get to know them first AND THEN ask out. The first thing I do is look for a ring. If no ring, I'll start talking. If they've got a ring, I generally move on and don't bother.

happy stud · 10-02-2005, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jennifer

Okay, Uber, you make a good point. Tell me what type of conversation would you make if you saw me. What comments and/or questions waould you say to me?

What has worked for me a few times is when I see a woman I really like I'll go up to her and tell her Im not from around here and then ask her what restaurants would she suggest to get something to eat. I aint never had one to chew my ass out and say go look up restaurants in the dam phone book. Every one of em has been real nice and told me about some of em in the area.

After getting them to talk a little I'll say well I make a deal with you if you meet me at that restaurant and tell me whats good I'll treat. I then tell em they can just meet me up there because i know most women aint gonna get in a car with a man they just met. Man Ive had a few that have taken me up on the deal. Cant hurt so ya'll ought to try it.

Marty5379 · 10-02-2005, 08:42 PM

Marty and Mo’s southern gentleman pick-up lines we’d use on Jennifer:

Damn, yer hotter than a jalapeno fart in the mo-havvy desert!

So are you on the bride's side of the family or the groom's side of the family or both?

Do you stop in here to pee often?

Want to come back to my trailer and check out the transmission in my bathtub?

I have a Wal-Mart credit card!

Can you check the spelling of my tattoos?

I don't know if you KNOW this or not but, my 2nd cousin's grandad on my father's side's brother's sister's wife knows Dale Jr. Wanna do it?

Wanna go to the dump and shoot rats?

You getta line, then you get this pole, honey.

I put the 'hick' in 'hickey', darlin'....!

My dad and my uncle like to watch us making out,..so whattya say the three of us go back to my place?

You know, you look just like your mama did at your age. I should know, I married her.

I'm drunk enough to think you're pretty if you're drunk enough to think I'm rich.

You know, 10 states across the south have accused me of this but if you ask me, its YOU that makes the "moon shine".

Sure it's Okie Dokie with my wife..she's always tellin' me to go out and take out the trash!

I put a Firebird front end on my Camaro. You wanna see?

My Momma has some big ol floppy boobies too, but yers sho dew stay in that tube top a lot betta!

and last, but not least, and the one that brings in the most women down south is ...

If you gots the hot beaver, I gots the "hot damn!"

Admit it Jennifer, you'd strip down right in front of us if we threw these southern pick-up lines on you!

formeormyself · 10-02-2005, 08:50 PM

Ok, well I don't use them.(cause I don't have to,I'm taken now!!yay!)But, if I wanted to be funny here are a few. Question: Do you like blue berries or strawberries?
Response to answer: I was just wondering so I know what kind of waffles to order you in the morning.

wwweeeeewwwwwww.....wwweeeeewwwww....wwwweeeeewwww You know what that was? That was the sound of the ambulance comin' to take me away, cause the sight of you stopped my heart

10 · 10-02-2005, 08:54 PM

Oh forme, those are soooooooo cheesy! Tell me you'd never actually use those!

jennifer · 10-02-2005, 09:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dirk diggler

I wouldn't use no pick up lines with you jennifer. I would simply flop my dong out and say, "now what do you wanna do?" and hopefully i wont get smacked or go to jail for it haha.

Dirk:

How many times has this worked for you? Haha.

dirk diggler · 10-02-2005, 10:01 PM

Is that a mirror in your pocket? cause i can see myself in your pants.

I lost my phone number, can i have yours?

Are you from Tennesee? cause ur the only 10 i see

jennifer · 10-02-2005, 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marty5379

Marty and Mo’s southern gentleman pick-up lines we’d use on Jennifer:

Damn, yer hotter than a jalapeno fart in the mo-havvy desert!

So are you on the bride's side of the family or the groom's side of the family or both?

Do you stop in here to pee often?

Want to come back to my trailer and check out the transmission in my bathtub?

I have a Wal-Mart credit card!

Can you check the spelling of my tattoos?

I don't know if you KNOW this or not but, my 2nd cousin's grandad on my father's side's brother's sister's wife knows Dale Jr. Wanna do it?

Wanna go to the dump and shoot rats?

You getta line, then you get this pole, honey.

I put the 'hick' in 'hickey', darlin'....!

My dad and my uncle like to watch us making out,..so whattya say the three of us go back to my place?

You know, you look just like your mama did at your age. I should know, I married her.

I'm drunk enough to think you're pretty if you're drunk enough to think I'm rich.

You know, 10 states across the south have accused me of this but if you ask me, its YOU that makes the "moon shine".

Sure it's Okie Dokie with my wife..she's always tellin' me to go out and take out the trash!

I put a Firebird front end on my Camaro. You wanna see?

My Momma has some big ol floppy boobies too, but yers sho dew stay in that tube top a lot betta!

and last, but not least, and the one that brings in the most women down south is ...

If you gots the hot beaver, I gots the "hot damn!"

Admit it Jennifer, you'd strip down right in front of us if we threw these southern pick-up lines on you!

Uh, yes, Marty, I have gotten completely NAKED after reading these lines! Yes, I can definitely see both you and Maurice using them!

dirk diggler · 10-02-2005, 10:02 PM

Has worked all the time and they've been very sucessful. The thing is, i wake up with a huge boner hahaha.

jennifer · 10-02-2005, 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by formeormyself

Ok, well I don't use them.(cause I don't have to,I'm taken now!!yay!)But, if I wanted to be funny here are a few. Question: Do you like blue berries or strawberries?
Response to answer: I was just wondering so I know what kind of waffles to order you in the morning.

wwweeeeewwwwwww.....wwweeeeewwwww....wwwweeeeewwww You know what that was? That was the sound of the ambulance comin' to take me away, cause the sight of you stopped my heart

And which one of these lines worked for you, forme? Haha,

dirk diggler · 10-02-2005, 10:06 PM

Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!

Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?

Baicarumba...are those real?

Be unique and different, just say yes.

Can I flirt with you?

Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.

Do you know karate? Cos damn it honey, your body is really kickin.

Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the Fine Body Investigators, and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.

Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

Do you want to see something swell?

Do you work for UPS / ParcelForce? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.

Have I seen you before? Oh, yeah, I remember - it was in the dictionary under the word FANBLEEDINGTASTIC!

Hey I'm looking for treasure, Can I look around your chest?

Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap hotel room across the street.

Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.

I have 4 words for you "Hol I Day Inn".

jennifer · 10-02-2005, 10:18 PM

Maybe I should have asked for everyone to share pick-up lines that WORKED!! Haha. Some of you guys are really funny! I'm not sure yet about your successes with women, but at least you are funny.

dirk diggler · 10-02-2005, 10:20 PM

http://joked.com/view.php?id=663&t=C...m_nr=1&total=1

dirk diggler · 10-02-2005, 10:26 PM

OUCH http://www.hoes.ca/clit_pierce_video.html

Funny stuff http://woopig.net/other/nutts.wmv

10 · 10-03-2005, 12:39 AM

dirk, just exactly HOW SUCCESSFUL have these lines been for you? LOL

dirk diggler · 10-03-2005, 01:30 AM

Oh im sure they work with some girls, I just havent been so fortunate lately, haha. Girls dont want to hear cheap pick up lines anyways, they want their man to be mature and of course hung like a horse. Its always worth a try though. I just turned 20 so i can be a little immature. Right?

dd

Marty5379 · 10-03-2005, 01:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jennifer

Uh, yes, Marty, I have gotten completely NAKED after reading these lines! Yes, I can definitely see both you and Maurice using them!

Yeah, I understand. When I was typing them in my wife walked in, read them, and immediately got naked, flooped down on her back, and said yes. Heck, I ain't even ask for it. That's was just from her reading it. If I'd actually said these things to her, she'd let me in the back door no doubt. It's all in the one liners with these southern women.

jennifer · 10-03-2005, 12:15 PM

Yes, most of the one-liners are pretty good. Women like a guy to make them laugh, so some of you are in pretty good shape. Keep it up!!

Jennifer

sikdogg · 10-03-2005, 06:45 PM

Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams. OR: I want to call your mother and thank her.

You see my friend over there? [Point to someone from afar] He wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.

Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me!

Oh my sweet darling! For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought to me.

Did you know that there are 265 bones inside of your body? {Wait for answer} "Yeah, and I could show you how to get one more?"

That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Use index finger to call someone over then say, "I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand."

Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.

There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

Do you have rubbers at your house or should I pull out?

Excuse me, I am about to go home to masturbate and needed a name to go with the face.

Are you here to meet a nice man or will I do?

Hi, I've been undressing you with my eyes all night long, and think it's time to see if I'm right.

I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking?

You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain, shortcomings? Well, I don't even own a car.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

Is you father a lumberjack? Because when ever I look at you, I get wood in my pants.

Let's have breakfast together tomorrow; shall I call you or nudge you?

Lick your finger and touch both yourself and the woman, then lean into her and say "Let's you and me get out of these wet clothes."

jennifer · 10-04-2005, 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sikdogg

Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams. OR: I want to call your mother and thank her.

You see my friend over there? [Point to someone from afar] He wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.

Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me!

Oh my sweet darling! For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought to me.

Did you know that there are 265 bones inside of your body? {Wait for answer} "Yeah, and I could show you how to get one more?"

That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Use index finger to call someone over then say, "I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand."

Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.

There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

Do you have rubbers at your house or should I pull out?

Excuse me, I am about to go home to masturbate and needed a name to go with the face.

Are you here to meet a nice man or will I do?

Hi, I've been undressing you with my eyes all night long, and think it's time to see if I'm right.

I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking?

You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain, shortcomings? Well, I don't even own a car.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

Is you father a lumberjack? Because when ever I look at you, I get wood in my pants.

Let's have breakfast together tomorrow; shall I call you or nudge you?

Lick your finger and touch both yourself and the woman, then lean into her and say "Let's you and me get out of these wet clothes."

These are good, dogg! And I can actually see you saying these to women. Any luck?

sikdogg · 10-04-2005, 12:35 AM

Only when they've been sufficiently liquored up...

formeormyself · 10-04-2005, 01:58 AM

No, I would never use those. But they are really funny to think about.

want8 · 10-04-2005, 02:25 PM

We are in a night club standing across the room from one another and I tell the bartender to take you a drink. When you start to drink it, I walk over and say, Excuse me, but the bartender gave you my drink by mistake and I reach out and take it away and say, but I would love to buy you one. What's your name? :::Jennifer::: Well Jennifer, what's a nice looking lady like you doing in here all alone?

Überschwanz · 10-04-2005, 03:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by want8

We are in a night club standing across the room from one another and I tell the bartender to take you a drink. When you start to drink it, I walk over and say, Excuse me, but the bartender gave you my drink by mistake and I reach out and take it away and say, but I would love to buy you one. What's your name? :::Jennifer::: Well Jennifer, what's a nice looking lady like you doing in here all alone?

Then her boyfriend comes out of the bathroom and beats the shit out of you.

want8 · 10-04-2005, 03:17 PM

LOL!! Easy dude, she asked for them, I just responded. Just doing my duty!LOL And I am kidding.

dirk diggler · 10-04-2005, 03:35 PM

And then Want8's boys come around the corner and beat the crap out of the boyfriend. Then Jennifer along with 7 of her hott friends come in and us guys bring them to a motel bang the heck out of them. the end.

sikdogg · 10-04-2005, 06:47 PM

I think that while you guys are beating the crap out of each other, i'll invite Jenn to my table and get her liquored up 'til my come-on's start working.

Überschwanz · 10-04-2005, 08:24 PM

Get her liquored up all you want dogg. A little ethanol has nothing on my übercharm.

jennifer · 10-04-2005, 10:26 PM

Liquor, charm, pick-up lines - what else could a girl want? Well, since I am a woman, I want more!! Haha. So, what else do ya got?

Jennifer

sikdogg · 10-04-2005, 11:35 PM

I have a thickie...