Military?

JonPop · 12-26-2005, 04:36 PM

How many of you are former or active Military?

JonPop · 12-26-2005, 04:38 PM

ARMY. Former, 82nd. Airborne

happy stud · 12-26-2005, 10:19 PM

Hey JonPop I never was in the military but I once fucked a woman that was in the Army when she was stationed at Fort Polk here in Louisiana.

JonPop · 12-26-2005, 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by happy stud

Hey JonPop I never was in the military but I once fucked a woman that was in the Army when she was stationed at Fort Polk here in Louisiana.

Haha. Only you could turn this poll into a fuck thread. BUT, since you fucked a Soldier, we'll give you an honorable mention.

marjam · 02-28-2007, 01:13 AM

Navy brat but never went active myself. Couldn't handle being told when, where and how I could do something. Also, got tired of moving every three years when I was coming up.

10 · 02-28-2007, 02:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by marjam

Navy brat but never went active myself. Couldn't handle being told when, where and how I could do something. Also, got tired of moving every three years when I was coming up.

That's the very reason I never went into the military. The thought of being woken up at 4am and screamed at or forced to do push ups in the driving rain or as you stated, being told when, where and how to do something never set well with me.

slickwillie · 02-28-2007, 04:06 AM

4 years Air Force and glad I did it!

JonPop · 03-02-2007, 09:32 PM

This is for you "Black Shoe" Navy people . I'm sure others can relate. Sent to me by an old Swabbie friend.

This is the way it was. Every time I start missing old "haze gray and underway," I go through this list. Funny stuff and right on target. - Author unknown.

1. Buy a steel dumpster, paint it gray inside and out, and live in it for six months.

2. Run all the pipes and wires in your house exposed on the walls.

3. Repaint your entire house every month.

4. Renovate your bathroom. Build a wall across the middle of the bathtub and move the shower head to chest level. When you take showers, make sure you turn off the water while you soap down.

5. Put lube oil in your humidifier and set it on high.

6. Once a week, blow compressed air up your chimney, making sure the wind carries the soot onto your neighbor's house. Ignore his complaints.

7. Once a month, take all major appliances apart and then reassemble them.

8. Raise the thresholds and lower the headers of your front and back doors so that you either trip or bang your head every time you pass through them.

9. Disassemble and inspect your lawnmower every week.

10. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, turn your water heater temperature up to 200 degrees. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, turn the water heater off. On Saturdays and Sundays tell your family they use too much water during the week, so no bathing will be allowed.

11. Raise your bed to within 10 inches of the ceiling, so you can't turn over without getting out and then getting back in.

12. Sleep on the shelf in your closet. Replace the closet door with a curtain. Have your spouse whip open the curtain about 3 hours after you go to sleep, shine a flashlight in your eyes and say "Sorry, wrong rack."

13. Make your family qualify to operate each appliance in your house - dishwasher operator, blender technician, et cetera.

14. Have your neighbor come over each day at 5 AM, blow a whistle so loud Helen Keller could hear it, and shout "Reveille, reveille, all hands heave out and trice up."

15. Have your mother-in-law write down everything she's going to do the following day, then have her make you stand in your back yard at 6 AM while she reads it to you.

16. Submit a request chit to your father-in-law requesting permission to leave your house before 3 PM.

17. Empty all the garbage bins in your house and sweep the driveway three times a day, whether it needs it or not "Now sweepers, sweepers, man your brooms, give the ship a clean sweep down fore and aft, empty all trash cans over the fantail."

18. Have your neighbor collect all your mail for a month, read your magazines and randomly lose every 5th item before delivering it to you.

19. Watch no TV except for movies played in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one.

20. When your children are in bed, run into their room with a megaphone shouting that your home is under attack and ordering them to their battle stations "Now general quarters, general quarters, all hands man your battle stations."

21. Make your family menu a week ahead of time without consulting the pantry or refrigerator.

22. Post a menu on the kitchen door informing your family that they are having steak for dinner. Then make them wait in line for an hour. When they finally get to the kitchen, tell them you are out of steak, but they can have dried ham or hot dogs. Repeat daily until they ignore the menu and just ask for hot dogs.

23. Bake a cake. Prop up one side of the pan so the cake bakes unevenly. Spread icing real thick to level it off.

24. Get up every night around midnight and have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on stale bread.

25. Set your alarm clock to go off at random during the night. At the alarm, jump up and dress as fast as you can, making sure to button your top shirt button and tuck your pants into your socks. Run out into the backyard and uncoil the garden hose.

26. Every week or so, throw your cat or dog in the pool and shout "Man overboard port side." Rate your family members on how fast they respond.

27. Put the headphones from your stereo on your head, but don't plug them in. Hang a paper cup around your neck on a string. Stand in front of the stove, and speak into the paper cup "Stove manned and ready." After an hour or so, speak into the cup again "Stove secured." Roll up the headphones and paper cup and stow them in a shoe box.

28. Place a podium at the end of your driveway. Have your family stand watches at the podium, rotating at 4 hour intervals. This is best done when the weather is worst. January is a good time.

29. When a thunderstorm is in your area, get a wobbly rocking chair, sit in it and rock as hard as you can until you become nauseous. Make sure to have a supply of stale crackers in your shirt pocket.

30. For former engineers: Bring your lawn mower into the living room, and run it all day long.

31. Make coffee using eighteen scoops of budget priced coffee grounds per pot. Allow the pot to simmer 5 hours before drinking.

32. Have someone under the age of ten give you a haircut with sheep shears.

33. Sew the back pockets of your jeans on the front.

34. Every couple of weeks, dress up in your best clothes and go to the scummiest part of town. Find the most rundown trashiest bar. Drink beer until you are hammered. Walk all the way home.

35. Lock yourself and your family in the house for six weeks. Tell them that at the end of the 6th week you are going to take them to Disney World for "liberty." At the end of the 6th week, inform them the trip to Disney World has been canceled because they need to get ready for an inspection, and it will be another week before they can leave the house.

Sure do miss my time in the Navy

Betterman · 03-05-2007, 01:54 AM

I should have. Chalk that up to one of life's regrets. I like what Anthony Hopkins says. "Live a life with no regrets." I like this saying.

JonPop · 09-16-2007, 09:01 PM

DEFINITION OF A VETERAN
A veteran - whether war or peace, active duty, retired, national guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to The "United States of America", for an amount of "up to and including my life." That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.

Author Unknown

Loki · 09-16-2007, 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonPop

This is for you "Black Shoe" Navy people . I'm sure others can relate. Sent to me by an old Swabbie friend.

This is the way it was. Every time I start missing old "haze gray and underway," I go through this list. Funny stuff and right on target. - Author unknown.

1. Buy a steel dumpster, paint it gray inside and out, and live in it for six months.

2. Run all the pipes and wires in your house exposed on the walls.

3. Repaint your entire house every month.

4. Renovate your bathroom. Build a wall across the middle of the bathtub and move the shower head to chest level. When you take showers, make sure you turn off the water while you soap down.

5. Put lube oil in your humidifier and set it on high.

6. Once a week, blow compressed air up your chimney, making sure the wind carries the soot onto your neighbor's house. Ignore his complaints.

7. Once a month, take all major appliances apart and then reassemble them.

8. Raise the thresholds and lower the headers of your front and back doors so that you either trip or bang your head every time you pass through them.

9. Disassemble and inspect your lawnmower every week.

10. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, turn your water heater temperature up to 200 degrees. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, turn the water heater off. On Saturdays and Sundays tell your family they use too much water during the week, so no bathing will be allowed.

11. Raise your bed to within 10 inches of the ceiling, so you can't turn over without getting out and then getting back in.

12. Sleep on the shelf in your closet. Replace the closet door with a curtain. Have your spouse whip open the curtain about 3 hours after you go to sleep, shine a flashlight in your eyes and say "Sorry, wrong rack."

13. Make your family qualify to operate each appliance in your house - dishwasher operator, blender technician, et cetera.

14. Have your neighbor come over each day at 5 AM, blow a whistle so loud Helen Keller could hear it, and shout "Reveille, reveille, all hands heave out and trice up."

15. Have your mother-in-law write down everything she's going to do the following day, then have her make you stand in your back yard at 6 AM while she reads it to you.

16. Submit a request chit to your father-in-law requesting permission to leave your house before 3 PM.

17. Empty all the garbage bins in your house and sweep the driveway three times a day, whether it needs it or not "Now sweepers, sweepers, man your brooms, give the ship a clean sweep down fore and aft, empty all trash cans over the fantail."

18. Have your neighbor collect all your mail for a month, read your magazines and randomly lose every 5th item before delivering it to you.

19. Watch no TV except for movies played in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one.

20. When your children are in bed, run into their room with a megaphone shouting that your home is under attack and ordering them to their battle stations "Now general quarters, general quarters, all hands man your battle stations."

21. Make your family menu a week ahead of time without consulting the pantry or refrigerator.

22. Post a menu on the kitchen door informing your family that they are having steak for dinner. Then make them wait in line for an hour. When they finally get to the kitchen, tell them you are out of steak, but they can have dried ham or hot dogs. Repeat daily until they ignore the menu and just ask for hot dogs.

23. Bake a cake. Prop up one side of the pan so the cake bakes unevenly. Spread icing real thick to level it off.

24. Get up every night around midnight and have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on stale bread.

25. Set your alarm clock to go off at random during the night. At the alarm, jump up and dress as fast as you can, making sure to button your top shirt button and tuck your pants into your socks. Run out into the backyard and uncoil the garden hose.

26. Every week or so, throw your cat or dog in the pool and shout "Man overboard port side." Rate your family members on how fast they respond.

27. Put the headphones from your stereo on your head, but don't plug them in. Hang a paper cup around your neck on a string. Stand in front of the stove, and speak into the paper cup "Stove manned and ready." After an hour or so, speak into the cup again "Stove secured." Roll up the headphones and paper cup and stow them in a shoe box.

28. Place a podium at the end of your driveway. Have your family stand watches at the podium, rotating at 4 hour intervals. This is best done when the weather is worst. January is a good time.

29. When a thunderstorm is in your area, get a wobbly rocking chair, sit in it and rock as hard as you can until you become nauseous. Make sure to have a supply of stale crackers in your shirt pocket.

30. For former engineers: Bring your lawn mower into the living room, and run it all day long.

31. Make coffee using eighteen scoops of budget priced coffee grounds per pot. Allow the pot to simmer 5 hours before drinking.

32. Have someone under the age of ten give you a haircut with sheep shears.

33. Sew the back pockets of your jeans on the front.

34. Every couple of weeks, dress up in your best clothes and go to the scummiest part of town. Find the most rundown trashiest bar. Drink beer until you are hammered. Walk all the way home.

35. Lock yourself and your family in the house for six weeks. Tell them that at the end of the 6th week you are going to take them to Disney World for "liberty." At the end of the 6th week, inform them the trip to Disney World has been canceled because they need to get ready for an inspection, and it will be another week before they can leave the house.

Sure do miss my time in the Navy

LMAO,
That was some funny shit.

Betterman · 09-17-2007, 01:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JonPop

DEFINITION OF A VETERAN
A veteran - whether war or peace, active duty, retired, national guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to The "United States of America", for an amount of "up to and including my life." That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.

Author Unknown

Hand On Heart.

BGizzle · 09-18-2007, 06:51 AM

Air Force, I hit 5 years in October. Cant say i love it but im proud to wear the uniform and I like my job(Air Traffic Controller). If it wasnt for "Additional Duties" I would love it. Me and my wife are both Active Duty.

JonPop · 09-20-2007, 08:31 PM

Get out of my thread you asshole spammer, Pharmant. I'll ralley these fine military men to kick your ass.

Betterman · 09-20-2007, 11:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BGizzle

Air Force, I hit 5 years in October. Cant say i love it but im proud to wear the uniform and I like my job(Air Traffic Controller). If it wasnt for "Additional Duties" I would love it. Me and my wife are both Active Duty.

What do you think of the up and coming ADS-B system. Are you using it already? Will this system replace your job.

SonicCelt · 09-21-2007, 12:53 AM

Well I used to be a member of the KISS ARMY .....Does that count??

squiggy01 · 09-21-2007, 01:49 AM

Unfortuneately I was not in any them either, but it wasn't from a lack of trying. I have bad knees and they like to do these funny little tricks when I am least expecting it.

JonPop · 09-21-2007, 02:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SonicCelt

Well I used to be a member of the KISS ARMY .....Does that count??

Keep It Simple Stupid.

JonPop · 09-21-2007, 08:30 PM

A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon
an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side
of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state.
The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both
men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.
The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the
highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw
each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled
to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scumbag who got
what he deserved, and he yelled back that Ted Kennedy is a fat,
good-for-nothing, left wing liberal drunk who doesn't know how to drive.
So I said that Osama Bin Ladin dresses and acts like a frigid,
mean-spirited lesbian! He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well, so does
Hillary Clinton!" "And, there we were, in the middle of the road,
shaking hands, when a truck hit us."

Betterman · 09-22-2007, 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Betterman

What do you think of the up and coming ADS-B system. Are you using it already? Will this system replace your job.

Just for the heads-up. The ADS-B is not an All Day Stretcher. I've attached the link below:

http://www.faa.gov/about/office_org/...nce_broadcast/

Überschwanz · 09-22-2007, 02:08 PM

I was watching the History Channel last night and they had the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program (MCMAP) as the subject of Human Weapon. It was really interesting to say the least and I learned a handful of takedown techniques by watching it. Makes me wonder how often these techniques get used in real combat.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marine_...l_Arts_Program

Betterman · 09-23-2007, 01:47 AM

I've read in the past. Where, if you're in a hostile situation. The fancy high kicks are a novelty of movies. I would say the article was right. Most Masters will tell you. You don't have to kick higher than the knee. If your into quick compromising locks Chin-Na is a very good system.

JonPop · 09-23-2007, 01:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Überschwanz

I was watching the History Channel last night and they had the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program (MCMAP) as the subject of Human Weapon. It was really interesting to say the least and I learned a handful of takedown techniques by watching it. Makes me wonder how often these techniques get used in real combat.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marine_...l_Arts_Program

Hand to hand combat takes place in the blink of an eye and usually when you are least expecting it. Scary shit.