gett1nbigger

is this true ladies?

Look, I know you men have it difficult. Women are just about impossible to understand, much less please. In a post-feminist society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. Women are bloody picky, I know we are. It can be scary, too, when women freak out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their best to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do.

But please, please just fuck me already. Honestly, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I like that you want to take things slow. I can totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but dearjesusinheaven, FUCK ME. We've done dinner and drinks. We've gone dancing. We've cuddled and watched a movie. I'm wearing a low cut shirt and you've been staring at my breasts all night. Goodgodalmighty, get to it and fuck me.

When we get hot and heavy, please take charge. Please, please fuck me. Trust me, I'm not going to just lie still - I'll get involved. But don't make me force your hand into my panties. That makes me feel like a rapist. We've been kissing for a half hour and your hand keeps grazing my ass. That's nice, but it's time to move forward. Get on top of me. Don't make me get on top right out of the gate and start bobbing up and down on your cock like I'm practicing some crazy new aerobic yoga because YOU won't go down on me. Roll on top and start dry humping like a good boy should. Don't gently suck my nipples and then pull back when I moan with pleasure. You being coy is totally not what I want. It's not what WE want.

OK, I know it's scary. There are lots of women out there who make fucking really difficult. So, I have compiled some handy tips. Don't think of this as complaining, or as schadenfreude for the Andrea Dworkins of the world. Just some simple tips, for timid men who have forgotten what it means to fuck like men:

1. Taking charge is not bad. Oh, there will be some women who feel that you are pushy. If you are making out with a woman, and she starts to push back, ask nicely if things are moving too fast. If she says yes, say something like "I'm sorry - you just look so fucking delicious. I'll go slower." Otherwise, skillfully move forward. If you start kissing a woman, and she responds well, and before long, you're both on the floor with her skirt pushed up, and you on top of her, it's not the time to roll onto your back and start awkwardly stroking the top of her head. Seriously, grow a goddamn pair. YOU'RE the man. Act like one.

2. Ohmyfuckinggod, please learn to respect the clit. It's different for every woman, so ask what she likes. Do not, I repeat, do not just wiggle your fingers around her pussy like you're trying to tickle her. Do not drum your fingertips against her vulva like you are impatiently waiting at the Sears Tire Center for your receipt. Do not push the clit like it is a doorbell at some house that you need to get inside of. Start by using all four fingers with firm yet gentle pressure against the outside of her pussy. Do not charge in with a single finger and start jabbing at things. And if you really don't know what to do, ask her. Just ask. "How do you like it?". It's a simple question, and most women will answer straight out. If she's being all coy, ask "Do you like pressure? Is it sensitive?" The clitoris is a varied item, indeed. Treat each one as though you have never encountered one before. Forget everything that your last partner liked.

3. Most women like to be fucked, and fucked well. Yes, there are women out there who want to "make love" every time - sweet, gentle, rocking love with lots of eye contact and loving kisses. Those women are not the majority. The majority like to be pounded. The majority like to have their hair pulled. The majority like a good, solid jackhammering. When a woman is bucking wildly against you, it's not because she wants you to pull back and slowly swirl your cock around her vagina like you're mixing a cake batter up there. It's because she wants you to hold down her arms, or grab her hips, or push her legs above her head, and fuck her harder. Don't be too afraid of what this means as far as gender equality goes - I am a raging feminist bitch, but I still want to be penetrated like you are planning on fucking my throat from the inside out.

4. A little roughness is nice. Do not pretend that you had no idea that some women like their hair pulled. Do not act shocked if she wants you to spank her ("Really? Spanking? Won't it hurt?" - yes, it does. That's the fucking point). We know you've read Stuff and Maxim, and that's all those laddie mags talk about in their "How to Please Her" sections. Start with light, full handed smacks to the area of her ass that she sits on. Judge her response and continue on from there. You don't have to bend her over one knee and tell her she's a naughty girl and that Daddy's going to punish her; save that for the fifth date. Women are less delicate than you think, so don't worry about breaking her hip.

5. It's OK for you to make noise. Otherwise, we feel like we are fucking a ninja. Unless you actually are a ninja, and have sneaked into our rooms with vibrating nanuchaku and zippered black pajamas, please, please make some noise. If you're banging a woman, and she's crying out and saying your name and moaning, and you can't even manage a grunt, she's going to feel like an idiot. You don't have to make the sounds she is making, but do SOMETHING. You know how when you are watching porn, and the girl does something great to the guy and the guy kind of goes "Ah!", half grunt, half yell? That's HOT. Do that. Whisper our name (assuming you know it) gruffly. Groan against her neck when you're in missionary position. You don't have to grunt like a mountain gorilla, but if you are totally mute, she's going to get worried.

6. Most women like dirty talk, in addition to the grunting. If you'd like to get some dirty talk going, ask her if she likes the way you fuck her. If she responds well, continue with something like, "I love fucking you. God, you look so fucking hot." Is she still moaning in response? "Your tits are so beautiful." Does that work? If she doesn't respond well to the term "tits", you might have to stop there. If she keep moaning or responding, pass Go and collect $200. Try the following:

"Oh, god. Your pussy is SO tight."
"You're so wet - are you wet because you like the feel of my cock ramming you?"
"I think I'm going to come inside you. I'm going to fill up your little cunt." It doesn't matter that you're wearing a condom; we LOVE hearing this.

If all of those work, you can then progress to things like "sexy little bitch" and "dirty whore". Tread carefully, but please, tread. Do not tiptoe. Do not sit down. Charge.

6. You're not obligated to eat a woman out. In return, she's not obligated to choke on your dick. Don't skip one and expect the other. If you do eat a woman out, the only comment you should make about her pussy is how nice it is. The length of her labia minora, the color of her interior, her waxing job or full bush - you are not John Madden. No time for color commentary.

7. Do not bitch about condoms. Oh, we hate them. Trust us. They hurt us more than they hurt you. But we don't want to be preggers, and you don't want to catch anything, right? Don't whine about condom sex. Do not explain that you can't come with one on. LEARN to come with one on, or if not, help us figure out what to do with you once we're satisfied and it's time for you to let loose your load.

8. We really like it when you come. It's called a money shot for a reason. Watching semen shoot out of you is one of the most gratifying things EVER. However, do not assume that she wants you to jack it off onto her face. She might, but don't assume. Seeing and/or feeling you come is rewarding for us, so there's no need to deprive us of it, but please do consult us before unleashing. "I think I'm going to come - how do you like it?" is a fair question that shouldn't rob you of your testicles.

In recent memory, I've been fucked by a very aggressive, manly guy, and I've been... well, fucked is the wrong term here. I've been penetrated by a total and utter wuss. Who am I going to run back to when I'm ready for my fill? Manly McHardon, that's who. ----------------------------------------------------

*New point of clarification - some people have brought up some really great issues in response to this post, so let me say this: I don't mean to imply that all women like to be treated like whores. I do mean to say that most women I know have told me that they like sex rougher than most men give it to them. Rough does NOT equal chains and bondage. And this applies to the bedroom only, and does not mean that she wants you to choose her dinner for her, or treat her like less of a person. **Some women have said that they don't like it rough and what the hell am I thinking? Well, girls, you're in the minority. HOWEVER, all women need to remember that, in addition to be straight forward about your sexual desires, you need to be straight forward about your sexual limits. Don't be afraid to ask for more, but when something feels wrong, say so. Don't ever do something you don't want to do in silence and then blame the guy. Silence is dangerous.

StrokerAce69

Have you ever read any of EBG`s posts...............?

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I may not go down in history......but I will go down on your little sister

Min'sGirl

lol, I say keep all of this in mind, but don't try some of the more "intense" things(hair pulling, ass slapping, just jumping on her and dry humping her) without first knowing if the girl you are with will be open to it. If you aren't sure and you have to out right ask, don't be afraid to ask.

newguy5050

Don't be afraid to ask for more, but when something feels wrong, say so. Don't ever do something you don't want to do in silence and then blame the guy. Silence is dangerous.

Beautiful.....

Pegasus

Who wrote this post was it a female member?
A lot of the problem with condom is just finding a type that suits you.
Ladies if a guy wants a certain condom and has brought it with him,> don't argue it's his dick going into it.

10

I was just thinking the same thing. WTF???

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earlybroncogirl

I don't think I ever mentioned "just jumping on her and dry humping her"...??

I believe what I said was taken out of context...if the entire profile is read you get the gist of where I'm coming from...and I also feel that what is being considered "intense things" might be one's own preference and considered by quite a few to be the norm?..my 2 cents

earlybroncogirl

[quote=newguy5050;72863]Don't be afraid to ask for more, but when something feels wrong, say so. Don't ever do something you don't want to do in silence and then blame the guy. Silence is dangerous.

Totally concur w/this statement...

" Don't ever do something you don't want to do in silence and then blame the guy"

earlybroncogirl

good advice!

Min'sGirl

That part, "just jumping on her", was added by me for giggle factor, I didn't actually read that in the original post, but it did say something about dry humping.

At the time I posted, I wasn't sure what to call it, so I used the word intense but put it in ""'s 'cause I wasn't quite sure what word to use, and that was the closest I could think of

To me, and from my experiences, hair pulling and ass slapping aren't the norm, that's why I said it is better to ask if you're not sure. I've never had it done to me(and I've only had one guy ask), that's what I was basing my opinion on.

hehe, found the "dry humping" part:

Madame Ace 71

Wow! After reading this one, I am aggressively horny. Look out tonight Stroker.

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No trees were harmed in the sending of this message and a very large number of electrons were asked for permission to be terribly inconvenienced. A party was thrown for them afterwards for being really cool about it.

Jon

Very good post. Im horn now too. lol

I have been too passive in the past, which has resulted in me not getting laid. I didn't realize it at the time, but after the fact Im sure thats why.

earlybroncogirl

the reason I made the correction is...it did sound "literal"...and could have been taken as such...thus I felt compelled to make that correction...

I would never advise someone to "just jump on someone and begin dry humping"...

bad advice

Min'sGirl

The OP is something that was written by you and posted by gett1nbigger?

"Roll on top and start dry humping like a good boy should." That was the part I was referring to, it just struck me as funny, that's all, sorry for the offense.

baybabe

You know WHAT we do love hearing this but now that I've read this I think all men are telling me what I wanna hear AND telling me the same shit they told ALLLL the other bitches! So now I'm feeling pissed AND aggressively horny lol... this person ruined it for the next guy... I tell you what!
Just Kidding... but not really

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"The curve is more powerful than the sword" ~Mae West

earlybroncogirl

Peg and MIn's...in answer to ur question...this is a bit of a read...might wanna grab a cold one...

fella's, I redid my online personal ad and got sooo many positive responses

continues on "EBG's dating rant

Min'sGirl

ahh, OK See, I missed that because you made that just a couple of days before hubby left for his deployment

earlybroncogirl

Girl, I am sorry ur sweety has been deployed....we here in Fayetteville support you guys 100%...

JonPop

Good people in Fayetteville. Everyone of us around the country, wishes your man to stay safe and return home, quickly. God Bless.

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I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG, OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AND TO THE REPUBLIC, FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL! AMEN!






I've got a Tiger by the Tail

Min'sGirl

Thanks EBG and JP 1 month down, (hopefully)11 more to go

StrokerAce69

Amen....

__________________
I may not go down in history......but I will go down on your little sister

Betterman

I think the problem is...Women have been urging themselves for the assertiveness of the man. When they get what they think they want.....

They change their minds. Please decide. If some, wouldn't think they have to be part of a gang. Just be thier individualistic selves. Maybe all women would be happier.

__________________
Enlighten the people, generally, and tyranny and oppressions of body and mind will vanish like spirits at the dawn of day. - Thomas Jefferson

"The individual is handicapped by coming face to face with a conspiracy so monstrous he
cannot believe it exists". -- J. Edgar Hoover, FBI Director 1924-1972, quoted in The Elks Magazine (August 1956).

"It is the duty of the patriot to protect his country from
its [corrupt feudal] government." -- Thomas Paine.

"Each of you, for himself, by himself and on his own responsibility, must speak". -- Mark Twain.

"The money powers prey upon the nation in times of peace and conspire against it in times of adversity. It is more despotic than a monarchy, more insolent than autocracy, and more selfish than bureaucracy. It denounces as public enemies all who question its methods or throw light upon its crimes. I have two great enemies, the Southern Army in front of me and the
bankers in the rear. Of the two, the one at my rear is my
greatest foe." -- President Abraham Lincoln.

"In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act." -- George Orwell.


For new rollers only -
http://www.naturesaccents.com/cart/c...c&p=34392e3935

earlybroncogirl

Mr B...I am somewhat of a tomboy...and I am thinkin maybe being mostly "alone" all of my life has made me be assertive cuz there has not been a man there to be assertive for me??...

then again, I may have it all wrong, bein raised by a single parent (man)....may have me wired a little dif than my counterparts

but still want my door opened for me and to be treated with respect (demand it actually) the respect thingy that is...

and THIS is what I find attractive in a guy..."aggressive, manly guy"

And then again, I may be totally off base on what your point is...and I'll blame that on my blond hair (it's dyed, but what the heck, I'll claim it!!)

any of that make sense to y'all?...

Betterman

I understand, I was merely posting on the ladies reference to post-feminist society. Mi Lady is also very independent and assertive, usually all too often. Yet, I wouldn't want her to be any other way. Post - Feminist Society was the reason of the statement of the post. On a side note, Life entwines many pathes. Just Live, Laugh, Love.

__________________
Enlighten the people, generally, and tyranny and oppressions of body and mind will vanish like spirits at the dawn of day. - Thomas Jefferson

"The individual is handicapped by coming face to face with a conspiracy so monstrous he
cannot believe it exists". -- J. Edgar Hoover, FBI Director 1924-1972, quoted in The Elks Magazine (August 1956).

"It is