Favourite Pussy Size Chart

Discussion in 'Anything Goes' started by psm, Mar 18, 2009.

  1. psm

    psm New Member

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    Ok. So there's no chart. Yet. But wouldn't it be nice if we weren't the only ones being measured?

    Think about this... We do nearly Mount Everest type of stuff to get to our
    individual goals. You go struttin' doin' yer average Friday night Walking Softly Carrying a Big Dick kinda strut. You land inside a freakin' house more suited to a fist or small pony than your Super-Size Me Babe dick on a stick.

    But she looked so tight. So squeeze me eight ways from Sunday and all night long kinda tight. She's only tiny. How in the eff did this happen?

    Because my bro's we haven't yet turned the tables. Please. I'm already way too busy. Somebody please do a Pussy Chart for men's favourites. Wanna make some money? Come up with a universal expandable dildo in both length and girth. Then let all the smug Cult of Entitlement Beatches insert and multiple, so we can see how they stack up. And no, your plastic tits don't count.

    My own personal favourite... Tight, tight, freaking tighter than a nun's _unt.
    So tight her ass looks huge. Nearly requiring a pry bar to enter AFTER orgasmic foreplay and enough grease to supply the entire cast of Hairdo. Tight.

    I had it. And I let it get away. But God it was SO sweet. Just like her. Must have been on drugs to have nixed that relationship. Tight. The template. Prybar tight. And just long enough to make her careful before popping.

    I had a woman who took my entire man's hand. What do you think her twat did for me? Even 16.5 wouldn't make her blink, I'm sure.

    So? Why aren't you typing? Let's get some clumsy chart material.
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2009
  2. 10

    10 <font color="#0066B8">Administrator</font>

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    Your post, psm, to say the least, is interesting. I'm not quite sure how we'd obtain a chart of the various pussy types out there. And I would say that most guys like a good, tight fit. My girl is uber tight and I attribute her daily kegels do her tightness (she's 49).

    I'd say we'd have to designate these pussy's tight, super tight, and so loose you could put your fist inside and then some.

  3. baybabe

    baybabe Moderator

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    lol yeah umm, I dont even know if WE know how tight we are?!?!? All I know is that I produce so much lube things slide easily but, say we have sex in the bath or something that takes all the self lube away...it kinda screeches in so we have to inch by inch it. So who really knows? We dont have means to measure.
  4. 10

    10 <font color="#0066B8">Administrator</font>

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    Shit, when it comes to self lubricating, Renee has the corner market. That woman is dripping wet by the time we get our clothes off and get ready for the main event. I slide right in and it's like a hot knife to butter............smoooooooooth as silk and oh so tight.........:a7:
  5. psm

    psm New Member

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    Modern conversation... because... well, I'm just so freakin' modern ...

    Her: How long are you?
    Me: Check the stats. (I like to be redundant; but why repeat myself?)
    Her: Excellent! I'm going to be a very happy girl.
    Me: (<This is me thinkin'.>)
    Her: How thick are you?
    Me: I tell her. But with less enthusiasm. I already knew more than my boyscout
    badge taught me.
    Her: (Much less enthusiastically) Very good.
    Me: (This is the first time anyone's every outright asked me for my stats. And
    how the eff does she know her personal favourite? INCLUDING her favouright
    thickness? Just how many one-and-only's has she had to give her this kind
    of product knowledge? I'm guessin' at least a hundred.)
    What's too thin for you?
    Her: (Woman code for CAREFUL or he'll notice that you're eyes aren't dilating anymore.)
    10-11 cms. (And said in such a way as to suggest, thank heaven, this is not you.)
    Me: (BS. <Again, this is me thinkin".> Just how long is it going to take me to pop her?
    You know, seeing as how we can all see here that she'd be dilating, (I just love
    that double entente thing when it happens. if I'd told her 16-17+. >)
    How do you know?
    Her:

    You get the drift by now, that it was me who was on the table and not her. Well,
    yes, we did get to the table. But that's not what I mean.

    What I mean is what I eventually got around to. Which is asking for her at rest depth.
    Insert and measure from your finger hold on the pen from when it touches bottom, at rest. Then I compared that to some online stats for what might be the "tented" depth and understood that I'd be ok with the length thing.

    Then I got to the thickness issue. And this is where she did the dodge ball routine. I did
    learn about the grease. She put all the slipping out down to the grease thing.

    Some women are wetters, yes? And some, are WD-40, but like something made from a
    sea creature. These women are NEVER dry. Not even the bathtub. Because, of course,
    in the scissors-rock-paper kinda way, grease always beats water and screw times are
    therefore never limited. You know, for those of us who just like to keep going like those
    cute little bunny rabbits on testosterone.

    But what about the girth thing?

    Yes, even the difference from a kegel when she's doing the pony thing(ride the white pony) makes a difference.

    Lastly, to "10"...

    "My girl is uber tight and I attribute her daily kegels do her tightness (she's 49)."

    A very lucky guy. She actually freakin' gets it and understands the art of reciprocity.
    Congratulations.

    Never let them do pussy tightening surgery. A nightmare for sexual responsiveness and
    enjoyment.

    Addendum... There are more pussy tightening exercises. I'm just sayin'.

    Now y'all...
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2009
  6. Pegasus

    Pegasus New Member

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    Psm this girl sounds like several hundred. Think how easy it is for girls to get sex.
    Even at a" mere" one a week a hundred is only 2 years.

    I estimate my friend swingergirl has had a thousand odd and this is not as unusual as you may think.
  7. Pegasus

    Pegasus New Member

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    Right I will have a go. First let me say I rarely see a pussy I don't like. However this is about favourite pussy.
    First the mound. I like it to be even and a reasonable size, that says I am a girl and I have a pussy. So say in the top half size. On the other hand, I do not so much like a couple of pound of steak, so take out the top 1%. The inner lips I like also big enough to make a statement, even and firm when erect. I like a big clit say top 10%, they are so easy to get off. It is also great to actually see them erect. Oh yeah and tight, but not so much I need a pinch bar. Hair trimed is ok waxed is ok, natural covers up what I want to look at.
    Last edited: May 8, 2009
  8. baybabe

    baybabe Moderator

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    Whats a pinch bar? I have to say, the way you described a pussy...never thought of it that way. You really got the details down.
  9. CUSP82

    CUSP82 New Member

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    I bet that comes with years of experience! How bout it Peg?
  10. MoP

    MoP New Member

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    Sorry PSM, your idea is already on the market.:tongue:

    Giant Inflatable Dildo
  11. MoP

    MoP New Member

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    Sounds like she anticipates the cumming moments with such intensity, she works herself into a froth. Hell, if you cupped her pussy with your hand. Her labia would probably be nibbling at your palm.:smile:
  12. MoP

    MoP New Member

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    The English makes a mold of the vagina. After the model is made it's an exact replica of the woman's vagina. Check out this bizarre site.

    Internal vagina casts
  13. W.M.P.

    W.M.P. Moderator

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    In my own humble yet obtusely humored personal world, these words have become an instant classic as of this very second. Genius!!!:a7:
  14. MoP

    MoP New Member

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    I used to use the analogy of a horse eating oats from your hand.:tongue:
  15. W.M.P.

    W.M.P. Moderator

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    ...and I gotta say I'm LOVING this thread. Kudos to psm for a wonderful postulation, steeped in plenty of warm humor and sprinkled quite generously with a great sense of wordplay.:smile:
  16. W.M.P.

    W.M.P. Moderator

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    That's a good one, but the visual of sloppy-wet labia nibbling and drooling at the hand is TOPS.:a7::a7::a7:
  17. 10

    10 <font color="#0066B8">Administrator</font>

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    I don't doubt it at all brother. In fact, I'll dirty text her while at work and she'll text me back "OMG, I'm soooooo damp and wet just thinking about your huge cock in my pussy......."

    This dirty texting occurs daily.
  18. Pegasus

    Pegasus New Member

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    Pinch bar, pry bar, crow bar, big bit of metal, used to get leverage on something hard to shift.
    Never thought of a pussy that way!! You must never have lusted after them as I have. This unfortunately, means you are straight.

    Yes Cusp, I have been(and am) a student of pussy. Thank you both for noticeing my effort.
    Now; how about some more descripitions of favourite pussy.
  19. CUSP82

    CUSP82 New Member

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    Honestly I never saw a pussy I didn't like! Have you?
  20. Pegasus

    Pegasus New Member

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    Rarely, however after awhile, found I liked some a bit extra.:a7::a8:
    Which is what this thread is about (sort of).
    Have wondered if early experiences influence what you like thereafter?